Keep You
by Yasu Uchiha
Summary: Sad little Songfic. Post-SK. Rose returns to Lissa and Christian and Adrian without Dimitri. She's stopped cold by a song.


**Eighteen minutes, not counting typing up the lyrics. Sudden kick to the rear end from my beloved Muse – the demanding, self-righteous… ANYWHO… Rose, Dimitri, Adrian, Christian, Lissa all belong to Richelle Mead's _Vampire Academy_ series; the song, "Keep You", belongs to Sugarland. Enjoy.**

_We said, 'goodbye', tried a hand at magic_

_But we couldn't make us disappear_

_Not a day goes by I don't wish I had you_

_So in a way I'm glad you're still here_

_It's a bittersweet victory_

_Lovin' the ghost in front of me_

Rose froze outside the door at the opening lyrics. Unbidden, her mind flashed back to Dimitri. She flinched, remembering him. Trying to stay away… Mason, Tasha… all of the broken hearts that came from it. How much they resisted each other… it wasn't meant to be. She still had him near her, in her heart. Always. There were many things a heart never forgot – true love was one of them. They were soulmates.

_It doesn't matter if you were soulmates. He doesn't have a soul to be mated with you, anyway,_ she scolded herself. She couldn't move, through; she had to listen to the rest of the song.

_Now I can't laugh, can't cry_

_And I can't run, can't hide_

_What do I gotta do_

_What do I gotta do to keep you_

_What do I gotta do to keep you from doing this to me_

That was honestly how she felt now. There was no escape. Even Lissa and Christian avoided her, she was so empty. Without Dimitri… even if she did have Adrian, now, he was a poor substitute for Dimitri's fire, Dimitri's love. Even if she had found him and been unable to kill him, being a Strigoi or dead was preferable to this pain.

_I wrote a couple of notes one in love, one in anger_

_They're lying there dying in the dresser drawer_

_Lived louder than my voice_

_Struggled through a stranger_

_He loved me 'til I loved you even more_

_It's a bittersweet victory_

_Knowin' someone else wanted me_

Even Adrian avoided her now. She was still deeply in love with Dimitri, and every time Adrian tried to win her heart, she fell even more in love with Dimitri. How strong he was, how warm…

She bit her lip to keep from crying out from the pain she felt so often now. She found her cool place, the only place within herself that kept her sane. The place devoid of all emotion; a small price to pay to rid herself of such strong pain.

_Now I can't laugh, can't cry_

_And I can't run, can't hide_

_You get used to the pain_

_And numb to the sting_

_'Til you can't feel anything_

And that was where she was. Numb to the pain… used to the sting… it was the only way to escape the soul-shattering, heart-wrenching feeling she got every time she thought of Dimitri. She slid down the wall silently, her fist pressed to her mouth. She didn't even notice the tears coursing down her cheeks.

_You tried to explain, but I couldn't hear it_

_As if your words were my tears_

_Flowin' freely, warm and quiet_

_From the edges of my eyes, in my ears_

_Then all that disappears_

She was overcome with grief. She knew no escape. There was no way to just leave her old life behind. Whenever Adrian or Lissa would try to help her, she would end up shutting them down so completely. _You don't understand the pain I'm in!! I loved him! He loved me! We were soulmates! Meant for each other!!_ She couldn't come to terms with the fact…

_Now I can't laugh, can't cry_

_And I can't run, can't hide_

_Now I can't laugh, can't cry_

_And I can't run, can't hide_

… he was gone.

_What do I gotta do_

_What do I gotta do to keep you_

_What do I gotta do to keep you from doing this to me_

* * *

It's nearly midnight. Really, I get inspiration at the oddest times. I've listened to this song god knows how many times, and just under an hour ago it hit me this would be the perfect VA song. So, hope you enjoyed and it wasn't too much crap. Review, if you wish. It really hits you, reading it while listening to the song. You should try it. Peace, lovers.


End file.
